Earlier today, A friend of mine asked me if i wanted to get married and I told her this :
“No... Being emotionally invested in someone is a huge risk. Men will make you feel shitty about yourself, Make you hate yourself, Make you think that something is really wrong with you. Then boom! You actually believe that you incapable of getting loved the way you want, you feel scared because you feel you are asking for too much, Then you feel you should fix yourself until you don't recognize yourself anymore. I love love but i don't want to get married. Im not ready to deal with uncertainty and anxiety and dull ache in my chest. I don't even have what it takes to be emotionally invested in someone, I will just be scared. Its exhausting!. With someone you care about, you actually meant to be at ease but every time I'm at panic mode, trying to save my head and my feelings, trying so hard not to get hurt. So, no I no dey reason marriage”.
Sha my mom shouldn’t see this because she is expecting her grandchildren already😭😭😂. Oh well, this is the longest reply i have ever given to that question and it made me realize if emotional investment in someone you like or love is worth it. Sometimes, someone gives you a reason why they are worth investing your emotions in and they give you ten reasons why you are wrong.
So, Is emotional investment worth it? Or Are we all exhausted😂?
PS: This is my first short post because my head is blank😂but i’d really appreciate your comments and opinions on this one.
Comments
Cont’d
… my advice is; before you get emotionally invested in a certain someone be sure it’s what they want and that emotionally, they’re intelligent
Some people don’t even know how to have emotional conversations. Yk the kind that it’s like your baring yourself waaa for the person. Either cause of fear from past experiences or maybe trauma and this brings me to point two; please HEAL🤲🏾 Both the investor and investee. All of you should heal and stop giving me breakfast stories to read on blogs
Lastly; ask for guidance. Take time to think and pray
Make I go continue to read for my exam biko. Love and thunder you guyss😚
A lot of the time you owe it to yourself to be able to screen the chaff from the fruits, and it is difficult. It is a long winding process that requires a lot of time, patience and self compassion. You owe it to yourself to forgive yourself from past mistakes and learn all the necessary lessons so you can move from a fear based relationship with love to an abundance based one.
This shift will also help the right people resonate with you and fulfill all your emotional needs and expectations, but it cannot come from a place of lack/ scarcity.
So yes, emotional investment is scary, but it’s only worth it when you’ve invested in yourself and your cup is full. Then and only then can you give all the love you’d like to, in a safe space, with safe people or persons your heart identifies with.
Cheers❤️
So people thinking Emotional investment is a waste of time. That's not true, I promise🙃